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During the course of our lives we often need comfort. When we require solace, where do we seek it?

We may find ourselves drinking an extra glass or two of wine at dinner to take the edge off. Perhaps we’re taking more prescribed medications than recommended to help us sleep. Or using other drugs. Or maybe we are gorging ourselves on unhealthy foods. These actions are aimed at sedating ourselves. All of them can lead to dependence, poor health and relationship issues. Unfortunately, we might end up in a far worse situation than when we started.

Are we restricting our food intake, or aiming for perfectionism from ourselves? Or are we spending too much money? These behaviours are focused on control and lead to health issues and financial difficulties.

Perhaps we are sleeping all the time trying to escape our reality. Or are we keeping ourselves crazy busy? Have we buried ourselves in our work? It could be that we lose ourselves in a fantasy world of books, and binging on TV and movies. These are all distractions and avoidance techniques, however, they are temporary, and do nothing to soothe our troubled souls.

Or do we frantically seek approval, love or sex from others expecting that will satisfy? Are we codependent? Seeking a sense of self and validation from other people is fraught with problems. Human beings are fallible and will let us down from time to time. Believing sex is love is a dangerous mistake. The comfort we feel from these things is fleeting, but the consequences can be quite devastating.

Maybe we are hyperfocused on our finances, possessions, or gambling. Believing if we only have enough money, or things, they will have the power to save us from our difficulties. But when is enough, enough?

Whatever we are doing, consciously or unconsciously, if we stop and assess the situation we will discover whether our method/s are successful or not.

The truth is, all of these techniques will stop us from focusing on whatever is disrupting our sense of calm, momentarily. However, they all have the ability to cause issues – dependence, debt, idolatry, an inability to meet our obligations, guilt, shame and relationship issues. Generally, our physical and mental health will suffer and we will become hyper-sensitive to stress and more depressed and anxious.

These coping strategies all put pressure on our ability to fulfil our roles at work, home and socially. Our relationships may experience hardship or break down. Our spiritual life will be impacted also.

The New Testament shows us that there is no way we can earn our way to peace and fulfilment. It is God’s gracious gift to give.

Unfortunately, at different times in my life I have used most of these things to try and soothe my soul. Yet, none succeeded to fill that God shaped hole that I was born with.

Where does our comfort come from?

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.

2 Corinthians 1:3-4 (AMP)

God is faithful to His promises:

O may Your lovingkindness and graciousness comfort me,
According to Your word (promise) to Your servant.

Psalm 119:76 (ESV)

It’s all very well reading these verses. But we must remember the goodness God has shown towards us in the past. Speak it out. Let these be our memorial stones that we meditate on.

Retreat to our quiet place and take time to be with God. To reconnect and know He loves us. He has not abandoned us. He will comfort us. He will be with us today and always. He will walk with us through whatever we are facing.

Be still and know that I am God ….

Psalm 46:10 (NIV)

It is at these very times we can give a sacrifice of worship to God. When we don’t feel like giving worship is exactly when we must. Bill Johnson says this is worship that costs us, and it is worship that is valuable and meaningful.

Then, we have to give something up. Another sacrifice. We hand our burdens to God and accept His comfort and peace in return.

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