Photo by BBC Radio 4 – image of baby copying – Bing images

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Have you ever noticed that when you smile at a baby they smile back? It is a beautiful example of how babies imitate a person’s behaviour. As humans we tend to copy or mirror one another. There is a famous Spanish proverb that says “tell me who your friends are and I will tell you who you are”. Or sometimes I’ve heard it said “show me your friends and I will show you your future.”

The people we hang around with have a significant effect on our thoughts, values and actions. They help to create the culture in which we learn and grow. That is why it is imperative we surround ourselves with people of integrity and good character.

Become wise by walking with the wise; hang out with fools and watch your life fall to pieces.

Proverbs 13:20 (MSG)

Are our friends people we want to mirror? People we hold in high esteem and want to be like? Or are we socialising with people who who treat us badly, steal our self-esteem and drag us down into thinking, talking and behaving in ways that lead to regret?

Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.”

1 Corinthians 15:33 (NIV)

In particular, who is our best friend? Our best friend is Jesus. He is the epitome of a selfless friend. He never disappoints and always follows through on His promises. He helps us to become all we were created to be. He never puts us down. As a matter of fact, he advocates on our behalf to His dad and prepares a room for us in His father’s house. And His dad is a pretty big deal. He will adopt us into His family and care for us all the days of our lives. He can open doors for us that we never even knew existed and closes doors on our past that need to be shut. He created the heavens and the earth, and He knows and loves us.

My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. […] You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit – fruit that will last – and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you. This is my command: Love each other.

John 15:12-14 & 16-17 (ESV)

Another aspect we must consider is, are we ourselves a good friend? Are we someone who listens, supports, encourages and blesses the other. Are we helping our friends to reach their potential, or are we part of their downfall?

Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.

1 Thessalonians 5:11 (ESV)

Are we copying the attitudes and behaviours of those around us? Alternatively, are we positively influencing them with Godly actions, deeds and words? Do we honour our friends? Are we there for them when they are suffering, not just the good times? Do we speak the truth they need to hear, even when it’s difficult? Or do we hide our Christianity from them, robbing them of the opportunity to know Jesus? Do we humbly ask to pray for them? Do we respectfully introduce them to our Lord and Saviour? Are we ourselves virtuous people and are we displaying the good fruits of the spirit –

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.

Galatians 5:22-23 (NLT)

Furthermore, are we modelling the character and attributes we would like to see in our children, grandchildren, friends, colleagues and our community? Or do we say one thing but do another? The bible tells us that actions speak far louder than words.

Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says

James 1:22 (NIV)

Bill Johnson asks are we thermometers – noticing the temperature (behaviour, attitudes, etc) of the room and reproducing that. Or are we thermostats – setting the temperature (culture, values and direction)?

If this conversation is challenging for you and the thought of leading rather than following brings fear, spend time reading your bible. Proverbs, psalms and the gospels are a good place to start. The bible is a manual for how to live your life. Worship and praise God. Linger with the Holy Spirit and ask Him to speak into your life, transform your mind and guide your steps. He will not disappoint.

I hope you were blessed by this blog. If you have any questions, comments, or would like to subscribe, please fill out the section below. God bless you and your family.

References:

BibleGateway.com: A searchable online Bible in over 150 versions and 50 languages.

OpenBible.info